I Hate You People
I didn’t watch the premiere of ABC’s Once Upon a Time because I have these two tiny inconveniences called testicles sitting between my legs. They’re mostly useless, but occasionally they do come in handy. Unfortunately the same can’t be said for 12.8 million people who actually turned on their TVs to watch the same re-packed fairy tale dreck that’s been re-cycled over and over for the past five years. Hey dips*ts, juxtaposing a sh*tty story with a modern backdrop doesn’t make it anymore interesting…
Can Once Upon a Time give ABC’s fall a happy ending? The fantasy adventure got off to a strong start in the ratings Sunday night, opening better than expected at 8 p.m.
Once delivered 12.8 million viewers and a 3.9 adults 18-49 rating, improving a whopping 86 percent on the usual time period average of Extreme Makeover in the slot. That makes Once Upon a Time the highest-rated new drama series premiere of the season — bigger than ABC’s Revenge, CBS’ Person of Interestor Fox’s Terra Nova.
This is why we can’t have nice things. Excuse me while I go drink myself into incoherence, Yes, I do realize that it’s 10:45 in the morning.