This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things

Hey, remember when I used to write about stuff that wasn’t football related? That was nice… anyways, if you have a life you may not have noticed that CBS recently gave America’s Least Talented Comedian Rob Schneider his own show, Rob! which co-stars Cheech Marin and is about how Rob! deals with his Mexican-American in-laws. Like all of CBS’s comedies (except How I Met Your Mother) Rob! is stupid, unfunny, and paints in broad, offensive ethnic stereotypes. Also, like all of CBS’s comedies, Rob!‘s debut was incredibly successful, because people are the worst. I’ll turn you towards the fine work of the people at Warming Glow for a full analysis, but here’s the money shot:

First off, if you haven’t heard yet, last week’s debut of the Rob Schneider show, “Rob” — also known as televised prostate cancer — received stunningly great ratings, as 13.5 million of “Big Bang Theory’s” 15 million viewers stuck around to watch Rob make fun of Hispanics while a woman with large breasts spoke in an accent. That actually doesn’t speak very well of the “Big Bang” audience, either. If you’re one of the 1.5 million “Big Bang” viewers that changed the channel, you might want to take a moment and dissociate yourself from the rest of your fake nerd brethren (real nerds watch “Community,” bitches)

Agreed, wholeheartedly. Believe it or not, that’s not the worst ratings news of all…

 Fox’s “Napoleon Dynamite” fetched 9.5 million viewers and a whopping 4.6 million viewers among the 18-49 demo (that’s how many viewers the most watched comedy on TV, “Two and a Half Men” received in that demo last night).

Must not start screaming at people on the street, must not start screaming at people on the street, must not start screaming at people on the street…

Napoleon Dynamite is the worst idea for a TV show since….EVER. THIS IS WHY WE CAN’T HAVE NICE THINGS AMERICA! Everyone I have talked to realizes that Napoleon Dynamite is a terrible TV show idea, yet it somehow got 9.5 million viewers. I’m starting to wonder if I exist in some kind of parallel universe or if this sh*t isn’t all just made up as part of some Michelle Obama conspiracy to get us all healthy by making TV unwatchable (if so, Kudos First Lady).


Posted on January 17, 2012, in Crappy TV shows, Napoleon Dynamite, Rob! and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 1 Comment.

  1. I love this blog layout . How do you make it. It is really cool!

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